Acceptance… it is such an easy concept and thing to understand. However, when it comes to grief it is an entirely different monster. When dealing with acceptance and grief, you understand the facts of your loss, you learn to adjust and readjust to your new way of life, and many other things. You realize that the ‘light at the end of the tunnel’ isn’t off, there was just too much fog to see it. Much like the other stages, you have to realize that this is also yours and you need to own it.
When we move through the stages of grief and move to acceptance, we have been through one helluva rough roller coaster. This phase of the grief process is a lot like finding your new ‘normal’ again. You realize that you have good times, bad times, and everything in between. We also realize that all of the feelings that we have are okay to have. We try to socialize again, return to old hobbies we enjoyed or sometimes find new ones.
Owning and Questioning
Within acceptance, just like I’ve said through every other stage of the grief process, you have to own it. I’ve come to realize that part of owning the acceptance also involves a lot of questions. I’ve questioned if I handled things ‘properly,’ or if I could have done something differently. For me, the acceptance phase is a ‘reset’ so to speak. I find my balance again, or as close as I can get to it. I take emotional stock of where I was, where I am, and where I want to be.
Where I was is important to acknowledge. I need to be able to recognize that I worked through emotions, thoughts, and I made it through. The emotions I started with are stepping stones in my healing. They are the things that lay the foundation for things I have to handle and deal with. Those are the core, and usually the strongest, emotions I have had in my grief process.
Acceptance is usually the hardest stage of the grief process. With that, it can also be one of the shortest, because we have a tendency to cycle through the other stages again.
Acceptance, something that sounds so simple, but can be the hardest thing. Take a moment this week, reflect on your moments of acceptance after grief. What helped you reach that? Is there something that helped you through to finally reaching the point of acceptance?
As always, we would love to hear from you. If there is something you’d like to tell us, share with us, or even ask; please feel free to comment below or you can contact us. Own your journey, and we will catch you on the flip side.